A letter to Angel

10/16/12

Dear Angel,

This is the deepest hurt I think I have ever felt. We were so excited when we found out you were coming but a few days ago I started spotting. By late night on 10/11 I knew but didn't want to believe it. Each time I flushed the toilet a piece of my heart went with you. I couldn't believe this was happening. It wasn't suppose to happen to us. I kept thinking don't freak out, its gonna be ok. This will pass like it did with the boys and come June you will have a full term baby. I don't know why this happened. Trying to figure it all out would just be too much, so we chose to trust that you were born into heaven for reasons we will come to find out later. We named you today because you deserve a name. Angel Gonzalez. August 31-October 12. ❤

I gave you a middle name. We think you were a girl but are unsure so we picked a name that would fit even if we were wrong. I hope if we are wrong you are not offended. We would have been so happy either way. Anyway, the middle name I chose was Nicole which means Victorious! I hope you like it. And if we are wrong and you are not a girl of course Nicole would be Nicolas.
 Love you bunches. Mama ❤